By Justin Criner
 

The 5 Myths of Happiness (you won't be happy till you understand these!)

Everyone believes in happiness, but your beliefs may actually be false. Happiness has many false beliefs. I will outline some of the most prevalent so that you can see them in your life. Once you realize these are myths then you can begin to eliminate them, becoming happier.

The 5 Myths

1) Happiness is time based
Are you waiting for happiness to happen to you? Is there a future time that you will be happy? Will it be after you retire? When you get a new job? When you get married or perhaps divorced? Will it be the WEEKEND, or after 5:00pm today? Will it be when you are in a relationship, when you lose weight, make more money, or any other future event? People are waiting for happiness to happen to them. They battle against the bad things in life and they hope that eventually happiness will come. Happiness does not come in the future! Happiness is not time based. There is no amount of time that will create happiness. If you are on this earth for a hundred, or a thousand, or a million years you will not be happy. If you are thinking that at some point in the future you will become happy, this is a myth. You can be happy now, but you cannot be happy someday, for someday never comes. Happiness is not predicated on time. It happens only in the now.

2) Happiness is event based

If I asked you “what would make you happy” you might respond with some event. Something happening to you that would create happiness in your life. Events come and go, but they don’t bring happiness with them. Marriage, jobs, vacations, are all events, but will they really make you happy? Have you ever been unhappy in any of these? If you have, this proves that happiness comes from somewhere other than an event.

3) Happiness is related to “stuff”

Material things are nice. They make life more comfortable. They can be fun, but they don’t bring happiness. Now we probably all know this to some degree, but most of us still live our life as if it is true. You might say “money does not bring happiness” but deep down, in your core, you probably still feel that some degree of happiness comes from money. The truth is that if you are unhappy now, you will be unhappy when you have more stuff. When you have more stuff there will be more taxes, more bills, more insurance, more things breaking, more problems. Happiness and stuff are mutually exclusive. They are not related.

4) Happiness comes from external sources

You may have noticed that the first 3 myths are external “things.” They are things that are outside of you, or yourself. While external things can help you to achieve happiness, true happiness comes from inside. Its true that a good relationship can seem to bring happiness, but first you must be happy inside. If you are an unhappy person then the good relationship will only carry you so far. Have you ever been with a good person and been unhappy? I know I have. I have had inner turmoil when in a great relationship. Even families can be a source of unhappiness. In other words, if the happiness is not first coming from inside of you, then you can’t receive it from external things. So you must have happiness internally. If you are looking for some external source to make you happy, or to bring happiness in your life then you will never find it for any lasting amount of time.

5) Fighting BAD creates happiness

“Bad” things happen every day in life. Most people fight against them. This means that they get upset, stress, hate the situation, talk bad about it, and resist it with their heart or soul. You can fight “bad things” as much as you want, but fighting bad does not create good. Said another way – dwelling on the bad does not create happiness. So your life has difficult things in it. So what! Every life does, but your life also has great things in it. Happiness is appreciated by dwelling in the good things. You have a choice. You can chose to dwell on what sucks, or dwell on what’s amazing. Its up to you. Usually when we dwell on what sucks we are fighting against it. We are talking about why it sucks, why we don’t like it, and how rotten it is. This does not create happiness. This creates more misery. Its called complaining, and complaining does not create happiness. So why fight bad, just enjoy the good.

Do you do any of these things? Are you looking for external sources of happiness? If so, its time to stop! If you catch yourself feeling unhappy where is that feeling coming from? Is it really coming from an external source or are YOU the cause of it?

Unhappiness also fits with these myths. Many people think that unhappiness comes from external sources, but it is the same as happiness. It comes from you, not your boss, your job, your broke down car, or anything else.